Stay Optimistic: You Owe It To Yourself
Outside it’s cold, you need to do so much for school, and when you wake up you find out you should already have been in class!
You forget to put your alarm clock.
Sometimes it just doesn’t seem to go your way.
In this part of the world (I live in the Netherlands) we like to complain when we know there’s still enough to be content about.
Nevertheless, many people are cranky, feel depressed or pessimistic.
While many of them seem to have many things going for them, judging from the outside, only a few people seem happy.
At least most of the time.
In this article, I’ll present you with several tips to show you how you can become more optimistic, stay content and find happiness.
Optimists differ in three important respects from those with a more pessimistic mindset.
These differences are mainly in how they assess situations.
Pessimists often think negative events will last long.
When a pessimist is fired, he will think: I ‘ll probably stay unemployed for the rest of my life.
An optimist, on the other hand, thinks, if I get busy, I will have a job in no time again.
When a pessimists relationship turns sour, it means that their life is worthless.
An optimist will realize that he still has many good friends left and a good job.
He doesn’t feel entirely dependent on his relationship.
Pessimists feel guilty for things that go wrong in their lives.
They are angry at themselves and carry a lot of negativity when something goes wrong.
Optimists seem less concerned with questions of guilt.
They are trying to solve a problem.
Mistakes are human after all, and it does not help to dwell on them.
Although the situation is the same, the optimist and pessimist have different interpretations.
In the first example, both get fired, but the pessimist is much more upset than the optimist.
Neither are right.
Indeed, it is only a question of how easy or how hard it is to find a job.
However, the positive attitude, when you are optimistic, is more likely to lead to action and increases the chances of finding a new job again.
This helps them stay optimistic.
So pessimists think differently.
The good news is that pessimistic people can learn the optimistic way of thinking.
Even if it doesn’t come naturally.
This is done by changing pessimistic thoughts into more promising ones.
Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement.
Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.
12 Tips To Stay Optimistic
1. Recognize when you have a negative thought in response to an event.
For example, suppose you have a setback at your job.
An important client says that he is very disappointed in your service. The shipment of your product arrived three days late, making him achieve less revenue.
2. Investigate how you interpret those situations
A pessimist will assume that this is bad news and also will affect the other customers.
Moreover, he tells himself that he should not have been so stupid to hire this transport company.
This will be the final blow; he assures himself that the firm will go bankrupt.
3. Feel what this interpretation does to you.
You apparently feel very dejected and annoyed.
4. See whether this is the only possible interpretation.
When you pause briefly, you know that the adverse event was the call from the customer.
The interpretation of the situation was that it was your fault that the other clients will also hear from this disappointed customer, and the company will go bankrupt.
Another interpretation, however, is also possible.
For example, it is not obvious that your dissatisfied customer will tell others about his experiences and for bankruptcy, it is still too early. Everybody makes mistakes; it’s about the way you deal with it.
5. Feel how this other interpretation makes you feel.
The feeling that accompanies these thoughts is much more positive.
Moreover, when you stay optimistic, it puts you into action because you’re going to find a way to make sure the damage to the customer will never happen again.
Maybe your approach will make sure that other customers will not hear of the error, but only about the manner in which you handled it.
On paper, this may seem a rather simple exercise, but in practice, it works well.
Who feels annoyed because he has experienced a negative thing, does well to look at his thoughts.
You might not turn into a raging optimist instantly, but it can help you get rid of the sharp pessimistic edges.
But the important thing is that you regain an active attitude towards your problems.
You focus not on what is wrong, but on how you can fix it again.
Who of the two is right, the optimists or pessimists is not important.
Who is most effective in dealing with his problems, is what counts.
Here are some more tips to get your optimistic engine running!
6. Stay Optimistic. Realize that reality is bendable
The reality does not exist.
There are currently around 7 billion realities on earth, and every person thinks that his or hers is the only true reality.
You can bend your reality how you want to.
By thinking positive, reality will look more positive.
By realizing that everything is relative, (including ‘good and bad’) you can experience life on your terms.
Stay Optimistic! The sun always comes out
7. Pay attention to yourself (and each other) if negativity steps in.
Find a buddy and help each other reframe reality.
Lift each other out of negative sentiments and try to turn in into a positive.
Do this in mind.
Leave a bell when you are in a negative thought spiral.
Pack your thoughts and point them in the other direction.
Focus on the things that are good for that which you think or talk negative.
Pessimism leads to weakness, optimism to power. William James
8. Concentrate on the many things that go well.
Many of us and the (social) media are too often obsessed with things that go wrong.
This is an excellent way to develop a cynical worldview.
Focus more and more on things that go well.
Make a regular list of stuff for which you are grateful for in your life. Realize that positive things are usually not labeled as “newsworthy” but they happen and are worthwhile.
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9. Feed your faith in the world to stay optimistic.
Rebalance your worldview.
The news tells you what they think you need to know about the news (including misery) in the world.
Add something positive to your day to shift the balance.
For example, consider a regular inspiring presentation at TED, which helps you to regain back some perspective.
Read a good book occasionally or join a voluntary organization and give.
Giving will make you often receive more than you bargained for.
10. Find the upside of ‘negative’ events.
Prove to yourself that everything is relative by searching for the silver lining in every ‘negative’ event.
A few examples:
- Because you have failed that test, you learn the important lesson that you have to work hard to achieve what you want.
A lesson that will help you further down the road to make dreams come true.
- Because you used to be bullied at school, you can feel empathy for children who are bullied, so now as a teacher you can rapidly step in when bullying occurs in your class.
- Your dog has died that gives you a lot of freedom you have not had for a long time.
You can now visit your sister in the UK.
You can also look back on the good memories you have experienced with your dog.
- Your car broke down.
Therefore, you had to take the bike to work.
You found out how relaxing it is to cycle, and you’ve lost a few kilos and feel much fitter.
Try to pick something positive from each experience. That helps you move forward; it keeps you on your feet!
11. Laugh more, let the sunshine in.
If you can decide how you want to experience life, you can choose how seriously you take everything.
Do not take life too seriously and laugh more!
Laughter is healthy.
It gives a boost to your immune system, your body relaxes, it delivers blissful hormones, and it’s a good workout for your body.
Laughter reduces anxiety, reduces stress and helps us to develop better relationships.
How do you laugh more?
- Play often.
With children, with pets, with your partner, colleagues, friends, and family.
Make jokes, play games, have fun.
- Enjoy comedy performances, movies, series, and books.
- Learn to appreciate the humor.
- Think occasionally of situations where you laughed your head off and have fun again.
- Do tickling.
12. Realize that positivity is important for yourself and the world
Stick to a positive attitude to life.
Once you find yourself losing your positivity, then do your best to find it back asap.
Positivity can be found in faith, love, progress, solidarity, and hope. Sometimes it’s not easy to stay positive.
But realize that it is precisely in these situations, that being positive is valuable.
Creating a positive attitude is important.
It is important if you want to be happy and if you want to bring about something positive in the world.
Smile. Everybody looks great with a smile on their face!